Syy.. This is a secret.

Hmmm. I'm thinkin bout tellin you a secret here. Can I trust you on keepin my secret locked? Can I? I guess I can, am I right? Wrong! But heck I'm tellin anyway. Still this is some kind of secret thingy.

If I can choose, I'm given a choice, I'll tell you what I'll do. Yessir. I'll be livin free! Pack my bags, grab my bass guitar and play more music. To hell with work. I'll be tourin where people want to listen. I'll be everywhere. Me, my band, my bass and a girl who understand. A perfect life. Might not be as said but in a sense, to me it's kinda what I'll choose. Play my music till I'm old enough to just lay back and see the much prettier world. Away from this megalomaniacs, away from wars, away from the chaos we changed our world into, away from pollutions, away from the unnescessary ever-changin trends we forced ourselves to cope with.

Only if. *sigh*. But I just couldn't. I know, I'm not that strong. Can't deny that. I'm not quite sure why but I guess this, this "need" just kept pullin me back into this state of neverendin cycle of "reality". Sometime I make my life sucks, most of the time I sucks fer makin my life like this. What is there to brag about, corporate image, gadgets, nice hairdo, bein on time. I still don't know. I know I just don't freakin care. Bah! All this just to be acceptable? To be like the "others"? Like "normal" people? I know I don't need that. Still, I'm in it. I'm amongst all of us, anonymous or not. Sellin our lives to the material world. Shit this is too much, my words I mean.

Can I just run? Away from all this disfigured and/or distorted face of reality? I know I can. But do I have "it"? Enough to pull my legs and start walkin away? Heck it'll be good if I can.

Would the band approve? Would they join me in this craziness of this, this liberation of souls? I'm not sure. I'm not sure I would want to know. I'm not sure if I would ever ask. I might be alone. Like I'd care if I am.

Someday. I know it's just a matter of the right time. I'll leave all this mess we call life behind. But I'll never regret this present life. Nor would I ever fake it. I might be in it and not likin it but I'm no hipocrite. I'm still livin the reality and that small sore in my soul, cryin to break free; still won't break me. Never will I hope. Because I know someday his wish will come true.

Too much dilemma. Some people might not get it. Some others might not get it right. In any ways, maybe it was meant not to be understood because, like I've said, it's a secret. Later.

Fractured Malacca and Nilai gigs!!!!!! Achtung!

Well well. Well well well well well well well well well well. Well.. Hah! Somethin just came up. Angah called today and said that Fractured have a gig spot soon. In fact, we got 2 gigs to go! The 1st one, this comin February. 19th February to be exact. The other one is on the 6th of March. I'm not quite sure which is when but the venues are: Malacca and Nilai (Negeri Sembilan).

Wowzer. Been a long while since we last perform. At last, a very long last, we finally got a chance again. Damn. Dilemma. Such a dilemma. I'm afraid I can't be too sure if I can manage playin in any of those gigs though. Why? W.O.R.K. Easy. To be honest, I'm not sure if I'll be around this comin month or so. Temporary re-location.

Heck I really do want to perform. Missed that a lot. I hope I can find me some time fer both gigs. Wish me luck OK? More info on this when I can confirm it. Later!

Another new link.

Ok I've put another link on the Blog Brother/Sister section. What's the blog about? Well you have to read it then.

http://rebellenation.blogspot.com/

Later.

Another hot basses. Yeoww!

Arghhh! Madness! I was searchin fer Ibanez Destroyer II basses on ebay when I stumbled onto a Dean. Hot damn. Me drools. Check it out!

http://www.deanguitars.com/basses.htm

Ouch. I know I'm an Ibanez fanatic but this is just too much. Itchy fingers.. I can't take it anymore! Me want oneeeeeeee! Later.

p/s: Just look at the darn Razorback. It'll tear my pants apart. Nasty stuff. On MY LIST!!! Yarrrgghhh!

Should've wrote a one-of-a-kind topic here but heck I'm bored.

B.O.R.E.D. Bored like mad. Urgh. I'm currently havin this urge of leavin all this things behind. Again. I need to get away. I really need to. Bein somewhere else. Somewhere I never been to. Some place where I can see new things. Somewhere nobody else cares. Somewhere I can get my feet wet with salty water and warm with beach sands. Ok now that narrowed the location of choice huh? No matter. The most important thing is, I need to get lost.

Here I am, sittin in the office. Me and Bobby lookin at our computers. He's in some chat room I guess. But I can't stand the songs he's playin. Arghh. It's like a mix of indo-rock and oldies and rock and pop and anime. Urgh. Well there's 1 Iron Maiden song in the playlist so it's not all bad. Wait. Now's it's the 4th rerun time of the list. Uhhhhhh.

Nothin is interestin here on the net. That explains the late mornin blog here. Gettin in and out of Yahoo!'s chat rooms meself. So it's official, I'm really bored. Been installin and uninstallin a few titles but no games are riddin this boredomness. Well all of my best picks is still in Syah's possession. Lucky brat. Speakin bout lucky, he's just a few month's left in bein a dad. Hah! Can't wait fer that too. Wishin his 1st born to be healthy, cute et cetera et cetera.

Converted my blog to Google's. So now I just need to log in usin my Gmail's account. Great. But where's the 'BlogThis' link usually found above my blog? Uh? Wait, wait. Does this mean I have to actually open up a new browser window and log in to blog? Ack! I love usin 'BlogThis'! It's so simple, clutterless, quick and, uh, simple. Please put it back. Please please.

My laptop is in my other boss's house (Ok I have a few bosses here... Sheesh.). And so is all my mp3s collection. Damn. It's hard to sleep without headphone on my ears and the songs from At The Gates, Lamb Of God, Dimension Zero, The Haunted, The Black Dahlia Murder *mumblin other names forever... and ever..* singin meself to sleep. Well at least I fell asleep much quicker now. Bah.

Oops. I've lost my interest in writin more in this post. So I guess that's it fer today. Later.

Raya and New Year in Kelantan..

Ah. Nearly forgot to tell about what happened in New Year's Eve. What? I was in Kelantan, went to one of my boss's hometown to celebrate Eid-ul Adha and New Year. Well, sort of. So here I'll tell you guys more about it.

I never went to Kelantan, although bein a Malaysian meself. So when my boss asked me if I want to follow him to his hometown, that reason alone is enough to make me say "yes". Well, another reason would be that I don't have a place to call my hometown now. Great, so then I can have a place to visit and celebrate Raya and New Year.

We move at night. Around 11 or later in the evenin. From Puchong, we went to somewhere in Batu Caves and picked a friend of my boss, his hometown buddy to be exact because they're supposed to go back to Kelantan together. Good, someone to chat with the boss so I can just have a good slumber at the back. Boy, I was wrong. So it seem that that guy needed me as the chatter to keep my boss awake while drivin so he can snooze at the back. Bah. Nearly got meself lucky there. But it was goin to be a good plan.

Don't ask me about the trip. My boss was speedin like mad, nearly went head-on with another incomin car because he was cuttin que somewhere where the only thing I can recall is darkness and some sort of forest. So he was usin a normal road instead of highways. My boss's window is stuck, he can't lower the window so I had to cope with the air-cond's torture. The view? Well, it's dark. And everytime I thought it's time to take a nap, that's when my boss steps on the pedal and speeds. Sheesh. Such price to pay fer a vacation of a sort. Bah!.

It took us less than 6 hours to arrive at Kelantan. As I woke up from a sleep I never can remember I had. The sun's risen, and I can see houses and shoplots everywhere. "At last" I said to meself. My brief adventure has begun!.

Kota Bharu was the destination. A different sight to see than other places I've been in Malaysia. One thing fer sure, there's a lot of jawi writings (Arabic letters) everywhere. Good. It's nice to test my own speed of readin the jawi. Every shop's signboard have jawi names of the shop. Even the advertisement billboard too!. Oh, speakin bout advertisement, in Kota Bharu Maya Karin wears 'tudung' (head scarf) in Celcom's advertisement. Lovely. Just lovely.

We drop my boss's buddy at his home, and went to my boss's home afterward. The warm welcome of his mother and sister made me feel like home in an instant. A 'nasi dagang' fer breakfast and a bit of a chat later, I failed to control my tireness and snoozed.

1st day in Kelantan was nothin much. As my supposedly tour-guide, my boss, spends lots of his time nappin and regainin energies he lost on the long hour drive. The food was great though. Proper 4 meals per day thingy. Maybe more. Breakfast, tea time, brunch (breakfast + lunch, I don't know why either... YUM!), lunch, more tea, dinner and not fergettin Teh Tarik session.

The next day. It was Eid-ul Adha and me and my boss just missed the Raya prayer. I know we both overslept. Maybe the snoozes yesterday ain't enough. So we had brunch and I was taken fer my 1st trip around my boss's hometown. 1st stop, his uncle's house to celebrate the Raya.

When we arrived, the 'korban' there was just over and his relatives et-cetera has just left. We missed another thing. Still, we was served with plenty of foods. Beef and even cakes. Oh before I fergot, we had cake fer brunch. Can you imagine that? If there's cakes, it surely means that it's some celebration. I'm fine with cake. But beef, and lots of it that worries me. You see, I'm allergic to meat. To everythin that has 4 legs. Tried it a few times in my life but I will always have this some sort of reaction on my skins. Allergies stuph.

Because I have no other food choices and I don't want to bother my boss about my eatin preferences, I just forced meself to indulge it. A bite here, a bite there. Guess what? I think I'm healed! No more rashes. No more vomitin. There was tiny red dots on my arms but that's all that is! I'm cured! Hurrah! Maybe this pimples thingy has shown somethin that changed inside me. I don't know. Fer sure it's Eid-ul Adha's blessin. Wow. Now I can really eat beef and meat. But because I'm still an amateur, I won't force meself to eat goat's meat or camel or anythin.

Later at night. My boss brought me to this place. A place I didn't imagine I'll be that soon. A beach at Pantai Cahaya Bulan. Used to be known as Pantai Cinta Berahi.

How was it? It was different. The waves there is much more lively and aggressive than Port Dickson or Pangkor. Feels like a place fer surfers. Well the waves is not as big as a surfer's dream it'll be but to me it's big. The sound of the waves, the smells of salt, the sight of the beach sand. Oh how I missed it so much. That was the time my mind wanders. The time I reminded myself why I love the sea so much. It was a soothin sight. My thoughts ventured out in the open sea, and I don't even know what the heck my boss was talkin about. That time, I just don't care.

Oh, I didn't tell you about my boss's cats did I? Well, he have 4 Himalayan cats and they're all sooooooooooo gorgeous! The 1st time I saw em. I just went AHHHHHHHH! Cute and cudly. But a bit too shy if I must say. I managed to get me hands on just 1 cat because the others would just love to stay away from me. Bah. Maybe next time.

Where else did I go? I went to the stadium. Had a drink with my office mate (he's a Kelantanese too.). Went to a few of my office mate's house fer the Raya. And they all serve cakes of all kind too!. And of course PCB (Pantai Cahaya Bulan)!.

On our way back to Puchong, we went to Gunung Stong (Stong Mountain). There was a high waterfall that can be seen from the road outside. The sight was so beautifull that my boss didn't hesitate takin a pit stop there. What can I say? The place is beautifull. Just magnificent. There's RM2 entry fee per person but the place is amazing. A bunch of chalet, great scenery, and not fergettin the waterfall. We was halfway (So I thought) gettin to the top of the waterfall but all three of us was shakin our legs off. Tiresome. I'm puttin that place in my list. There will be next time fer sure.

Next we went to Cameron Highland. To you momoe, BOH have a tea plantation there. It's cold up there. The sight? Wow. So many plantations. Strawberry, tea, flowers, honey bees and many others. It was like I'm in another country up there. The last time I went to Cameron was ages ago. When I was still in elementary I guess. Sorry I didn't get you any tea there momoe. Maybe another time dear?

Gettin out of Cameron Highland was another story. You can say we took a road that seems to be taken straight out of a Japanese car-driftin movie. I was excited in the first few minutes, the green sights, the cool and fresh mountain air and the windin road. But then the road went forever. As I was lookin fer the end of the road, I saw none. So I dozed off.

When I woke up, we're already in a highway and I was in dire urgent of relievin my full kidneys. In other word, I needed to pee. And fast!. I had to control my urges, nearly doin the unthinkable, like peein out of the window or somethin fer more than 10 kilos before I can dash and I do really mean dash to the toilet and end my sufferings.

Back in the car, I got voted to drive the car back. No complaints here though because I know I'm the only one who had slept the most. As we went back into the highway in God knows where, my thoughts went back to all the beautifull and amazing places I just left behind. Not forgettin the cute and cudly Himalayan cats too. Maybe next time. Later.